Building Self Confidence

How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time. How do you climb a ladder? One rung at a time. How do you build confidence? One step at a time.

When you take small steps, the anxiety you inevitably feel is more manageable. That's why it's important to have a go at things which you would previously have found scary on a regular basis. Do you find it hard to talk to people? Strike up a conversation with one new person every day! Do you keep quiet even when you have something to say? Speak up, say your piece! You gain encouragement and feel more confident every time you build on each small success.

• Do something practical to expand your self-confidence every day. Take measured risks. Each small step should be accompanied by a clear intention, an affirmation (or change of thinking) and mental rehearsal.

• Adopt the Boy Scouts' motto, 'Be prepared'. Before taking each step, do your homework. Find out what you need to do, practise the skills and acquire the relevant knowledge. Ninety per cent of the outcome in any activity depends on the quality of the preparation undertaken.

• As you tackle each step, use the full ITIA Formula (see page on 'Building Confidence' ). Use an affirmation such as: I am confident, enthusiastic and fully capable of... (name the step you are about to take).

• Mentally rehearse each step. Imagine it done well and 'see' it working out perfectly.

• Now go ahead and do it! Ignore any anxiety or discomfort, and remind yourself that anything your mind can conceive and believe; you can achieve. If it doesn't work out, change your approach if necessary, and try again. Above all, keep your mind on what you want, never lose sight of your goal, and persevere.